Each year Jesus’ parents went to Jerusalem for the feast of Passover,
and when he was twelve years old,
they went up according to festival custom.
The parents of Jesus were doing their best to raise the son given to them by God, immersing him in the traditions and the feasts of his people. This appeared to have become a part of their routine and as such they were able to trust that if Jesus was somewhere in the caravan then he would be safe even without their immediate attention.
After they had completed its days, as they were returning,
the boy Jesus remained behind in Jerusalem,
but his parents did not know it.
Jesus, who gave humanity the command to honor their fathers and their mothers, was not disobedient to the commandment. He did not break a positive command given by his parents. He did something which he certainly understood they would not prefer he do in order to meet the demands of a higher good, obedience to his heavenly Father. It was not merely a preference of his, but rather, as he explained it "I must be in my Father's house" (emphasis mine). It seems to us that he wished to expose his parents to the reality that the necessities of the Father's will in the plan of human salvation would often differ from what they might otherwise prefer. This three days that they spent searching for him pointed to another three days during which Jesus was in the tomb prior to the resurrection. After that, too, he was sought. Mary Magdalene, in that instance, said, "Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have laid him, and I will take him away" (see John 20:15). In both cases we see images of the bride from the Song of Songs, crying out, "Have you seen him whom my soul loves?" (see Song of Songs 3:3). And what did they ultimately learn in both cases but the truth of what Jesus taught when he said, "seek, and you will find ... the one who seeks finds" (see Matthew 7:7-8).
Son, why have you done this to us?
Your father and I have been looking for you with great anxiety.
It was only natural that the parents would experience anxiety at a time like this. The saving will of God made demands upon them all. Even Jesus himself experienced anxiety in this regard so great that he would sweat drops of blood in Gethsemane. The parents were already participating, albeit unknowingly, in his salvific suffering. But Jesus gave them the reassurance of his confidence in the Father, the same confidence that allowed him to overcome his human aversion to suffering and to give his life for the sake of the world.
“Why were you looking for me?
Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?”
The parents thus came to understand even more deeply the connection of Jesus to his heavenly Father and the priority of his will. After treasuring these things in her heart Mary was prepared for the increasingly difficult nature of her son's mission. She treasured the fact that Jesus was not only her son but also the Son of the Father in heaven. She treasured the memory of when she heard from him, at age twelve, a wisdom so great that "all who heard him were astounded". This boy who was her son and also the Son of God could be trusted absolutely. His absence could therefore only result in an ever greater future union. As she stood on at the cross and wept she no doubt continued to treasure this memory in her heart as she persevered in faith.
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